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how to soften an intense personality

14. The Psychotherapist Imi Lo defines emotional intensity as 'a form of neurodiversity that is most often misunderstood by our culture.' It means feeling things deeply, ricocheting between highs and lows, and experiencing emotions in profoundly intense ways that other people cannot feel. Some people are extroverts, while others are painfully shy. Talking to an intense person demands a level of concentration and interaction that can be emotionally draining. And your heightened senses and emotions give you the ability to respond to people, situations, and surroundings with a clarity thats unique. Intense people. Taking things slow isnt a bad thing, and if it feels like things are getting too intense too quickly in a relationship, then they probably are. By clicking "subscribe" you agree to receive emails from Amie Valpone and accept our privacy policy and cookies policy. Dont subject yourself to the same self-study that you feel driven to undertake and try to practice mindfulness when you can, to engage with the world around you peacefully and thoughtfully. 3. 1. They can often be on the same page as those who are overly sensitive. You can be carried away by something beautiful to the point of feeling enraptured. If you cant seem to have a normal, emotionally-neutral conversation with them anymore or you feel pressured into sharing when you arent comfortable doing so, its worth addressing this or taking a step back from the situation. If half of these makes you excruticiatingly intense whayt dpes it mean if every single point hits home. I was still a 10 year old girl in survival mode just trying to toss food in my mouth standing up in my apartment and doing everything to just survive while pushing so hard to get things done. Like anything, emotional intensity has a positive and negative side. It appalls you when someone is content to remain ignorant. Stevens's murder was the result of a deep-seated and intense hatred. And then there are intense personalities a type the grown-ups in your life may have been cautioned against becoming when you were a child. To the point of mental exhaustion. Overthinking and a tacit sensitivity to emotional overload makes more intense people more exposed to feelings of anxiety. oxx. May your growing self-knowledge enrich and strengthen all your relationships. Couldnt we get together for lunch sometime.she needs a mentor like you. You need to be able to trust that a person you share a relationship with will be there for you for the small things as well as the big. And youd do anything for them. in Corporate Law. Your entire personality appears more aggressive or at least harsher to them. This can make the person feel extremely flattered or extremely uncomfortable. This is when you can see solutions clearly as opposed to having a knee-jerk reaction, which does nothing but effect your health and emotions as well as effect the other persons health and emotions, as well. Being highly perceptive 4. Learning Mind 2012-2022 | All Rights Reserved |, 8 Signs You Have an Intense Personality and What It Means, What I Learned from Divorcing a Narcissist: 6 Tips, How to Own Up to Your Mistakes & Why Its So Hard for Most People, 10 Signs of a Superficial Relationship That Is Not Meant to Last, 10 Traits of a Feisty Personality People Often Misunderstand. More commonly, it's because of the level of emotional engagement they are demanding from you. An Intense Person has Emotional Depth and Passion. After all, what is wrong with having a strong personality? However, those rules are frequently challenging to implement. 4. They excel at interpersonal skills because of their compassion and depth of feeling. 3. Thats a special task, but it can often seem exhausting. What Is Your True Color Personality Type? We dont realize how our past can have such a strong hold on us until we become aware of it. Continue reading if you want to learn all you need to know about how to calm down an intense personality, which is covered in detail in this article. They are often intense in their energy and their emotions. Polish everything you type with instant feedback for correct grammar, clear phrasing, and more. Otherwise these characteristics can be taken as a positive dose to my personality. I wasnt feminine. Intense personalities have no time for trivial relationships, and thrive on full throttle romance and finding someone they connect with on a deeper level. You are clinging to your closest connections. So, theres zero payoff for appeasing them. One of your greatest delights is in learning more about things that matter to you. 8. You are unconcerned with what others think of you. While intense personalities may turn some people off, many more people want to learn to communicate with them better. And I was like.OMG. Here are a few things you might be wondering: To respond to the following two questions, you may be extra to individuals who are not as intense. If we feel safe, it doesnt take long for us to open up. Why should I be less intense (to please someone else)? . They have a rich inner world with a vivid imagination 9. Feel free to contact me on the contact page of my website. Although you and others can see the beauty and positive qualities of your emotional intensity, there are times when you may want to dial it back or you may need to due to the situation. If you identify as being intense, its important to remember that a lot of people may not know how to handle you. As you can imagine, that behavior isn't always well-received. You make eye contact to fully engage the other person, as well as to engage yourself and pay close attention to every nuance of their reaction. We acknowledge the Traditional Custodians of the land, the Whadjuk people of Noongar Boodjar. More so, their body language speaks volumes about how they think of those around them. Over 200 vegetarian recipes free of gluten, dairy, soy, sugar, eggs, peanuts, corn and other inflammatory foods. We want to spend all day, every day, with our loved ones. If someone stepped on it, we would cringe, shriek, or melancholically stare at its remains for longer than the average person.. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Home Revitalize Mind Body How to Soften Yourself: A Key Step for Healing. We easily become emotionally bonded to characters in books, TV shows, and movies. An active way to examine and express your thoughts is to start a journaling practice or start expressive writing regularly. Positives around experiencing intense emotions are that you can feel great empathy towards others, be truly in touch with your feelings, and be a sensitive and caring partner. A healthy debate is good for your mind and for sharing and appreciating different points of view. Needless to stay I was tough. But, deep down, an intense person is likely more misunderstood than anything. So, my question to you is what would happen if you stopped fighting everything and started paying attention and getting still and accepting what was going on in your life? If a person has frequent and dramatic mood swings, it can be difficult to deal with. 19. We hope you find this article helpful! And hours. Soft-hearted personalities are emotional which means that anyone who is angry with them or says something mean about them, can hurt them easily. But yes, some of these are risky if youre someone whos very anxious about outcomes in life and playing the victim card. When you always seem to find a metaphorical raincloud over your head when youre talking to a person, then it sounds like you need to be a good friend and remind them to lighten up. But right now, I'm dealing with exasperating circumstances in my life that make me boil at times. Prolonged Eye Contact- Means long lasting eye contact between partners or between potential love interest. but since most of us werent (myself included), thank you for pointing out the importance for us to teach to ourselves as adults. And hours. how to soften an intense personality Learning Mind does not provide medical, psychological, or any other type of professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. I was more like a librarian than anything. A. You use strong words. Beautifully written Amie! Comment below! And for some, your intensity can make it hard for them to feel relaxed around you. And I.wasnt. This article reminds me that Ive grown over the years as well as I can continue to develop. Sometimes beauty can make you feel such intense emotions that you cry, or youre moved to a state of ecstasy. Up until recently. It takes a strong will to reach the finish line when things get tough. My lifestyle was so scattered and my healing wasnt consistent because I wasnt treating myself with respect. All content published on this website is intended for informational purposes only. When you're a sponge. YES you are so right. Looking very forward to hearing from you. Thanks. 10 Top Secrets Of The Type C Personality You Need to Know, The Proof Is In: 101 Things That Are Guaranteed to Make You Smile. The Intense personality sounds very similar to Highly Sensitive Person. Intense people are usually in a rush. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. You don't waste time on small talk. Aka., we feel everything intensely. You ask a LOT of questions because you have a deep and overwhelming desire to understand things, ideas, and people to their core. We spend hundreds of hours every month writing, editing and managing this website. Trust me. 6. Describe their mouth, nose, brow, chin and ears. Watch out for loud, fast talkers who, even if they ask you a question, never seem to draw breath long enough to hear your answer. I grew up with the mentality of When the going gets tough, the tough get going. And whats so bad about being a strong-willed personality, anyway? in Applied Accountancy and B.Sc. Helping the "Emotionally Intense Person" As someone who contributes to the well being of others, you've likely enjoyed contributing to many. Make sure, if you know someone like this, that they arent asking too much of you. And you have zero tolerance for fakery. Why do I need to be less intense (to please others)? These include being excited, feeling fearful, being happy, and experiencing despair all in quick succession. I confess, I haven't been a perfect angel. You love to learn and expand your mind. And trust me, this isnt something a doctor will tell you to do. It was mind blowing and life changing. It is no one's fault, but it is easy for you to be frustrated by a partner, as you think, feel, and sense the world at a different pace. Dont get me wrong, I wasnt mean or a tomboy or some crazy intense kid, but I was intense on a different level that I didnt even realize. Spend some quiet fun time with her. But what does it mean to have an intense personality and how do you know if you have one? She said, you brush your teeth too hard, you brush your hair too hard, etc. how to soften an intense personality. Is often arrogant or haughty. Given this lack of emotional stability, an intense person is more likely to have sudden outbursts, find it hard to break out of a mood, and feel compelled to share and act upon their feelings even if they know it sounds irrational. INTJs are not casual people. I'm not an angry person. ITs something I didnt realize until I was 33 last year and a bunch of different energy workers/healers told me this. Here are five things to consider before entering into an intimate relationship with any INTJ: 1. C. Made them feel silly with a witty and intense come-back. Its best to try to have a balanced outlook on life and try not to become too wrapped up in one person or activity. There were a few other instances I remember this feeling. To improve the world, we need people with ideas and commitment. Why? What does this have to do with healing? It may have made others more comfortable but I found that being more accep. They push, push, push to get things to work out their way or simply ignore the anxiety and stress and shut down the emotions that these reactions cause. This article reads like someone identifying with some rather maladaptive traits as a way to justify them, thus avoiding the painful personal work required to move past them and operate with more ease. You hate ignorance and unexamined assumptions. If youre a person who experiences impassioned, fervent, frenzied, vehement, and agonizingly ardent emotions youre probably an intense person. Please do your own research before making any online purchase. There are 12 signs that indicate you have an intense personality: #1 You Speak With Conviction When an individual with an intense personality is categorically convinced that he's picked the best course of action, people who follow him unknowingly absorbs this belief and the accompanying emotional state. Theyre said to be the radicals of society, the misanthropes of the world, and the killjoys of polite and amicable conversations. how to soften an intense personality. 7. You believe 100% of what youre saying and you say it with feeling. One of the most complicated parts about having an intense personality is that many people conflate intense people with intimidating people. If the abrasive person is your peer you will share how his or her behavior impacts you and request that it stop. I never realized how these instances stuck in my mind until I started meditating everyday and all of these memories started coming up for me. Thank you Ellen; this is lovey! I feel as though you had wrote this with me in mind. Lots of love! We can heal ourselves with guidance! Youre hungry for new experiences that can teach you more about something that matters to you, even if they only help you identify your likes and dislikes. #2 You're Willing To Make Sacrifices The fight or flight mode, the stress response in our bodies, is what gets inflammation kicked up, gets our blood pressure up and pulls the blood in our body away from our organs and away from helping our body detox (our liver) and digest our food (stomach) and focus on hormones (reproductive system) and so those systems start to shut down over time because the blood in your body rushes to your arms and legs. You have a tremendous inner drive (or fire), Youre interested in truth (some people may be uncomfortable with your brutal honesty). One minute theyre up, the next theyre down, they love you, they hate you. 18. Here's how to tell if you're an intense person. Intensity is all about emotion, and if you feel that someone is too intense, then youre probably uncomfortable with how emotionally open they are. Therefore the norms may be more challenging to reach for others. At the same time, he seems to expect others to accept his word, decision, or logic just. This might be because they are racing through topics and questions that are hard to keep up with. 22. Interacting with a soft-spoken, calm, and a collected person can be challenging.

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